how (not to) make prison chili

Start with Mom's White Chili Recipe, which I shan't reproduce here, and basically ignore alot of it, and fake the rest.
Ingredients:

• A bunch of ground chicken (I think I had about a kilo)
• Couple of carrots
• Some onions
• Cans of beans (pinto, garbanzo...whatever you got / whatever goes in "chili")
• Can of corn

I use our Le Creuset, which are the most awesomest kitchen dishes evHAR: basically a big iron pot coated in some nigh indestructable enamel. Heat it a little and it stay hot forever, slowly radiating heat from all over into whatever is in it...anyway any crock-pot / Dutch Oven kinda thing will do.
Chop up the onions. Chop up the carrots. Since this is prison-style, chop them badly; all different sizes and generally too big, to ensure uneven cooking and impractical eating. Put pot on stove, dump carrots and onions into pot, turn on heat. Cook for a bit. Dump in the chicken. Add some spice (aka Cumin + "Italian Seasoning" + black pepper if you want). MC MixAlot.

Dump the beans and corn into a bowl and SAVE THE JUICE from the beans and corn cans.

When the onions are translucent and the meat is nicely browned, dump in the strained beans + corn. Also pour in about a cup or so of the beans/corn juice.

Let sit on stove on low heat for hours / days.

Now the interesting caveat to this story: as you can see from below, I ate some chili for lunch a few hours ago.

The lovely wife just texted me to inform me that the chili smells funny and has probably gone bad. After I already ate my lunch.

I have some more chili in my other bento for dinner, so just to verify, I smelled it...yup. Smells not like what prison chili is supposed to smell like.

Oops.

The good news is I am quite healthy and hearty these days, so my stomach has not complained at all about eating a bunch of spoiled chili.

The bad news is I now have no protein for dinner...will go down to the AM/PM and buy some...I dunno what, actually. Cannot imagine they have any protein that I can eat. Maybe I'll just get some tofu or natto or something.

So the moral of the story is: cook the chili on the stove for long enough until the juice is all gone and it's a proper thick and chunky meal...but don't let it sit on the stove for so long that it spoils and smells like my socks after jumping rope 850 times.

The untimely death of the chili just means I will be piling into the 2 kilos of shrimp and cans of tuna in pure water even sooner!